We all hail from Brookhouse, a village in North Lancashire. For the first decades of our lives we would regularly see each other, often daily, particularly when we got into our early 20s. We shared infants, football and nights out. Latterly good food and wine.
Simon was a deeply thoughtful person; an inspiration to both of us. He was always ambitious and had ethics, morals and standards that where part of defining his character; and what made him such a good friend and a nice person to be around.
Thoughts From Mark: Simon my Best Man
Simon, I’m proud to say, was Best Man at my wedding in 1991…… Strangely, earlier that year, I randomly met Simon in Harry’s Bar in Manchester, a popular haunt for us then…… I asked him if he’d do the job. He was wary at first as there’d be responsibilities………formalities to respect, speech’s etc. Over the next few pints we made a pact………as best man for each other there’d be no best man’s speech, as the pressure could detract from a great days drinking…and we stuck to it…..what a great party we had at each others weddings.
My first memory of Simon was first year of Brookhouse primary school, 1968. For some reason I started later than the rest of the new starters by a couple of months so first day for me as a 5 year old was pretty daunting. Anyway Simon, I think, sensed this and befriended me and made me welcome ………. I think Simon held on to that kindness, intuitively throughout his whole life. We had some great laughs as kids growing up in Brookhouse we played every weekend for Caton football under 12/14 and 16’s. We had more enthusiasm than skill getting beaten most of the time, generally by huge scores…..John Hayhurst can testify to this if he’s in the crowd anyway we’d laugh out loud at how rubbish we were and the double figure defeats.
After much drinking and hilarity in our late teens and twenties, responsible life took over……..we were both married men with families and we’d both moved away from where we grew up as kids…..and very rarely saw each other. However, around 2008 I moved back to the area where we grew up as kids, I’d also, developed a passion for hiking and the mountains myself, we started meeting up occasionally and had some days on long mountain walks around the Lakes and Dales……….. I retired earlier this year and was looking forward to Simon retiring too, as we’d discussed many more walking adventures going into the future.
Also, about 10 years ago Me, Simon and Kev started meeting up every year or so for a ‘boys’ night out…… inevitably, these nights always ended up us having too much drink, debating loudly and huge hangovers……….This tradition continued, sadly we should have met up in December, we postponed it……………….Simon’s company and those nights out will be greatly missed by Kev and myself, we’ve lost a brilliant friend.
From Kev: Mr Foy: A kindred soul
Simon and I go back a long way. I have a photo of Simon and I sharing a pram. I have only ever known life with Simon being there. I have lots of photos of us in fields and with pretend guns. Simon has been a massive part of our lives, and the length of time does not seem enough, but the quality of the time together was very special and the things we discussed and did would probably fill several lifetimes of friendship. My own loss is one words cannot describe.
From an early age Simon was an individual, a unique character. He was always polite and impeccably honest. He dressed well and you were always proud to introduce to anyone. Preschool Simon and I played: war and cowboys and Indians. Simon always wanted to be the Germans or the Indians – he taught me to value the views of others and look at the world differently. I learnt a lot about Rommel. Mick, Simon’s Dad, evidently loved history and Simon was his star pupil. I learnt of North Africa and Stalingrad.
Simon talked regularly about the preschool shopping bus journeys that we and our mothers made into Lancaster. Simon was quiet and always impeccably behaved. We always stayed in touch through school years despite having a fight when we were about 8, following a game of football. He won, the fight – not the football.
Simon loved cubs and scouts, he was aspirational, he wanted to be a ‘sixer’ and soon got his reward. Scouts allowed him to express his love of the outdoors and self-discipline. It helped him develop his knowledge of the local fells and crags. This benefitted Mark and myself in later years with Simon’s knowledge of the Yorkshire Dales and Lakes. I remember going pot holing with him on Ingleborough once where he was allowed to be much more adventurous. Two elder statesmen of Caton Scouts – Patrick Milston and Ian Thompson send their condolences to Sarah and family. Simon went to Our Lady’s High School. Over the following years I gradually got to know some of his mates: Phil Doherty; Ellie, Barnsey and Laurie. Great people who Simon cherished.
One summer Sunday morning, in the late 80s, Simon and I went through university courses in the newspapers on the floor of his front room. The following day I gave him a lift to Leeds for an interview in the Merrion Building, Leeds – he got accepted and that afternoon he found a flat on Hyde Park – the rest you might say is then history.
Simon and I shared many perspectives; we studied similar subjects at university; had similar jobs and we also always shared political and ethical views. We were both driven by wanting to address inequality but rarely discussed work. We were politically aligned at the hip.
By the time we got into the late 80s we all started to go our own way. Simon moved to Leeds; he met Sarah; became a family man He did not hold back letting us know of his love for family life. We did share our weddings. His family marked his life’s fulfillment. As our respective lives moved on we stayed close and understood each other and found it easy to express our thoughts. Those early years of friendship meant we knew each other’s characters, loves and dislikes.
Simon was there for me. He was there for me at my wedding. He was by my side at my Dad’s funeral in 1990 and a few months later I was there for him at his mother’s funeral. Simon was close to his mother, and it hit him hard. I was there for his wedding and hopefully served him well, although Mark was probably the true best man for him. I knew the joint best man role meant a lot to both of us. He did not want to let me down after a lifelong friendship; he had moved on; but not quite.
A friend said to me a recently that Simon always spoke to him in an American Detective voice – this typified the era, when Simon, Mark and myself used to go out round the pubs and clubs of Lancaster and Morecambe. He was funny and entertaining. Simon had massive integrity. He never sort to be the centre of attention. Self-deprecating, a sign of a decent person and a warm personality.
If there is one negative, it was Simon lived in Yorkshire for 3 decades but always made it clear that his loyalties were to the Red Rose of Lancashire. I recently had lunch with Simon in Harrogate we discussed our plans, work, retirement, relationships and families. He remained full of ambition and fulfilment. He got great joy out of his family; his life and his career. Simon changed little over the years but evolved. Much we have seen of Simon in recent years is the same person we saw and liked, in infants and through his growing up years.
My life is now a lot emptier.
